The Bangkok Recorder.

A Weekly journal will be issued from the
printing office of the American Missionary
Association, at the mouth of the Canal,
"Klawng Bangkok Yai" It will contain such
Political, Literary, Scientific, Commercial, and
local intelligence, as shall render it worthy
of the general patronage.

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dents subject to the usual restrictions.

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Speak Gently to the Little
Ones.

Jamaica

That anything will be done to expi-
ate this crime is very unlikely, and we
fear it must be added to the many
other abominations with which Eng-
land seems to delight to fill her cup to
overflowing. The attempt of Governor
Eyre to throw the responsibility of
this bloodshed on a letter of the Rev.
Dr. Underhill, addressed privately to
Mr. Cardwell, the colonial secretary,
exposing the wrongs of the negroes,
will help to arouse the dissenting body
in England. This letter was to Gov.
Eyre for his information, and by him
published in the Jamaican papers! So
that he alone is responsible for its ef-
fect on the people, if any it had.

England must settle this matter with
her own subjects, and before the tri-
bunal of the civilized world; but it has
a lesson which extends beyond the
limits of her empire. Its instructions
seem to have been providentially meant
for us at this precise moment of our
history. The state of things in Ja-
maica, which has filled the hearts of
the ruling class there with panic, and
thus occasioned these horrors, is pre-
cisely that which the rebel party in
the late Slave States is trying to esta-
blish there. Though nominally free,
and even with the right of suffrage un-
der a property qualification which vir-
tually disqualifies the great majority,
the negroes are ground down by cruel
and oppressive laws, and reduced to
the most extreme poverty and misery.
This reacts on the prosperity of the rul-
ing class, and is fast bringing the island
to bankruptcy. That insurrection will
inevitably result from the state of
things there unless prevented by wise
measures of justice on the part of the
home government, is plain. The fears
of insurrections of which we hear as
existing at the South are proofs of a
sense of the injustice that provokes
them. The planter-party here, exact-
ly as in Jamaica, are not to be trusted
with the making of laws for the gov-
ernment of their region, nor yet with
the execution of them. The American
Nation and the British Empire are
justly charged with this office, and will
be responsible for the results if they
neglect to discharge it rightly. An
external force can regulate such a dis-
turbed and disjointed machine as the
government of a state passing from a
foundation of slave labor to one of free
labor. The English government left
this responsibility virtually to the
former slave-masters, and we see what
has come of it-—poverty for the labor-
er, ruin to themselves, and bloodshed
and terrorism for all. It is for Congress
to see to it that we do not make this
same blunder, under circumstances
far less excusable—-for the Jamaican
planters had not dared openly to rebel
thirty years ago. We are without ex-
cuse, if we suffer the rebels at the
South to avenge their defeat on the
blacks there and on the whites here.
They must be held in the tutelage of
the nation until they have grown ac-
customed to the new state of things,
and content to allow the black men
who are among them, and the white
men who may come among them, to
enjoy all their constitutional rights as
men and as citizens, without molesta-
tion. And this as much for their own
sakes as for that of the parties needing
present protection. This done, and
the South country will soon rejoice in
peace, safety, and prosperity, which
will overflow and enrich us all. Neg-
lected, the fate of Jamaica surely a-
waits the guilty region, and the pun-
ishment will be shared by us, who
might have prevented it and refused.

Signs of Character.

"Trifles make up the sum of hu-
man things," and it is surprising how
readily an experienced eye can read
character from the slightest and most
insignificant data. Don't you believe
it, reader? Just allow us to give you
a few whispers on the subject-—a peep
through our own special opera glass-
es, at the world around us.

When you meet a young man with
plenty of bad cologne on his pocket
handkerchief, and a stale odor of ci-
gar smoke in his hair, you may be
sure that he was bold enough to con-
tract a very bad habit, and not bold
enough frankly to take the conse-
quences of it. In cigar vs. cologne,
the plaintiff has the best of it.

When you see a woman with her
shawl fastened all awry, and unmend-
ed fractures in her gloves, it is a pret-
ty sure index that she reads novels
and lies abed late in the morning. If
you happen to be wife hunting, don't
be misled by her bright eyes and cher-
ry cheeks. A girl who cannot spend
time to keep herself looking neat,
ought not to be trusted with the care
of shirt buttons and cravat ends, to
say nothing of the husband appended
to these articles!

When a gentleman hands up your
fare in the stage as politely as that of
the gorgeously dressed neighbor with-
out reference to the fact that you
wear calico and cotton gloves, rest
assured that he is lacking in no
courtesies to his own wife at home.
And if a lady-—no, a woman-—ac-
cepts his politeness as a mere matter
of course, with no "thank you!," no ac-
knowledged smile, then you may con-
clude that she has entered into socie-
ty on the bubbles of petroleum-—not
on any merits of her own.

When a lady-—no, once again—-a
female goes to the grocery in a rust-
ling silk dress, and does her morning
shopping in a diamond ring and a
cashmere shawl, it is a sign of one or
two things, either she does not know
any better, or she has no other place
to display her finery.

When a "nice young man" who
is paying you particular attention,
speaks shortly to his mother, or omits
to pay his sisters the little attentions
that come so gracefully from man to
woman, it is apt to be a sign that his
wife must put up with the same sys-
tem of snubbing and neglect as soon
as the first gloss of the wedding suit
is gone.

When a lady finds Macaulay's His-
tory a dreadful bore, and skips the
historical part of Scott's novels, it is
not an unfair inference that her brain
is not very fully furnished.

When a gentleman cannot talk
fluently on the subjects of ancient and
modern interest, but "polkas" charm-
ingly, we may conclude that his
brains—-such as they are—have all
settled down to agile heels.-—Now,
we do not disapprove of dancing, yet
we must confess to a preference for
having the brains a little higher up.

When a girl entertains you with
spicy ridicule of her gentlemen
friends, "showing up" their various
imperfections and weaknesses, take
your hat and go. If you need any
comfort, there will be sufficient in
the fact that you will furnish your
share of amusement to the next ar-
rival!

Put not your faith (speaking from
a feminine standpoint) in gentlemen
that wear diamond scarf pins, and
spend their leisure time on hotel steps,
for it is very likely they belong to the
extensive class of society for whom
Satan is popularly supposed "to find
some mischief still!" to keep their
idle hands in occupation. Better lav-
ish your smiles on the sturdy young
carpenter in shirt sleeves and overalls,
who works by the day; it will be
more profitable in the long run.

When a woman finds Sunday the
"longest day in the week," it is a
sign that there was some woful defi-
ciency in her early religious training.

When a man speaks irreverently of
sacred things, let it suffice as a warn-
ing to trust him in no single matter.
No matter how brilliant may be his
talents, how fair his professions, there
is a false ring to his metal. Don't
trust him.—-Phrenological Journal.

Pres. Johnson's Popularity.

President Johnson is, perhaps, at
this moment, the most popular man
in the United States, or, at any rate,
the man who is least assailed by detrac-
tion. The moderate Republicans, De-
mocrats, the Southerners, and the men
who eschew all party ties, freely avow
their confidence in him. Well, what
has he done, and what is he doing?

Nothing whatever, unhesitatingly we
reply, which can be construed into the
faintest suspicion that he contem-
plates the probability of another mili-
tary contest. On the contrary, not
merely the tone of his diplomacy, but
the whole scope of his internal adminis-
tration, indicates the fixed determina-
tion of the American people to keep
the peace. About this time last year,
the Northern States alone were com-
puted to have had a million men un-
der arms. They have now barely
100,000, and these are being reduced
to a normal establishment of 50,000.
The work of "mustering out" has
gone on with a rapidity that has as-
tonished Europeans, and civil society
has absorbed, and, we may say, as-
similated, more than nine tenths of
that immense army. There are doubts
whether this disarmament has not
been carried to an extent too great for
the maintenance of internal order and
security; but, as a nation, the Ameri-
cans have acquiesced and approved.
There has been a corresponding dis-
mantling of a numerous and powerful
fleet. Every kind of warlike expendi-
ture has been similarly cut down, and
Secretary M'Culloch is broaching plans
for the extinction of the public debt
within thirty years. All this betokens
a settled purpose on the part of both the
Government and the people to cultiv-
ate pacific and friendly relations with
foreign Powers. In short-America
has buried the hatchet; and ,although
she is too high spirited to bear an indig-
nity, she is plainly indisposed to snatch
up arms in a spirit of recklessness.
Mr. Chandler's motion was "tabled"
—-that is, rejected—-in the Senate by
two to one. His notice of it created
general uneasiness in the States; its
fate restored confidence, and was felt
as a relief. Even if it had been carried,
the President would probably have
declined to act upon it. We may,
therefore dismiss it from our minds
with a sense of satisfaction that it has
only served to bring out into stronger
relief the disinclination of our Trans-
atlantic kinsmen to be hurried into a
quarrel with us. We can heartily re-
ciprocate the feeling, and if in the fu-
ture, as in the past, there be occasional
word-sparring between them and our-
selves, we shall yet cherish the trust that
underneath superficial differences there
is substantial unity of sentiment and
interests, and that henceforth there will
be less and less danger of any serious
disturbance of the friendly relations in
which it is desirable, for the sake of
human liberty and progress, that Eng-
land and America should ever stand
towards each other. Ill. Lon. News

A Hundred years Ago.

One hundred years ago, there was
not a single white man in Ohio, Ken-
tucky, Ind, or Illinois territories. Then,
what is now the most flourishing part
of America, was as little known as
the mountains of the moon. It was
not until 1769 that the hunter of
Kentucky, the gallant and adventur-
ous Boone, left his home in North
Carolina to become the first settler in
Kentucky. The first pioneer of Ohio
did not settle till twenty years after-
wards.

A hundred years ago, Canada be-
longed to France, and the whole po-
pulation of the United States did not
exceed a million and a half.

A hundred years ago, the great
Frederick of Prussia was performing
those exploits which have made him
immortal in military annals, and with
his little monarchy was sustaining a
single-handed contest with Russia,
Austria and France, the three great
powers of Europe combined.

A hundred years ago, the United
States were the most loyal people of
the British Empire, and on the poli-
tical horizon no speck indicated the
struggle which, within a score of
years thereafter, established the great
republic of the world.

A hundred years ago, there were
but four newspapers in America—
with a combined circulation not ex-
ceeding 2,000. Steam engines and
cylinder presses had not been imagined,
and railroads and telegraphs had not
entered the remotest conception of
man.

When we come to look back at it
through the vista of history, we find
that the century which has passed has
been allotted to more important events
in their bearing upon the happiness
of the world, than almost any other
that has happened since the creation.

A hundred years hence, who can
foretell our developements and nation-
al greatness? Loraine Co. News.

Freedmens Prospects in
Georgia.

Ex. Gov. Herschel V. Johnson in a
speech delivered last Dec. has the follow-
ing noticeable paragraph.

“We are now to enter upon the ex-
periment whether the class of people
to which we are in future to look as
our laboring class can be organized
into efficient and trust worthy labor-
ers. That may be done-—or, I hope
it may be done—-if we are left to
ourselves. If we cannot succeed,
others need not attempt it; and I
trust that in the future we will have
the poor privilege of being let alone
in reference to this class of our
people.”

A writer for the N. York Independent
has made the following just remarks on
the spirit of Georgians towards the Freed-
men

“I bear you sorrowful witness that
there spoke the true Georgian. He is
sublimely ignorant of the fact that the
negro is also a child of the republic
—-sublimely ignorant of the fact that
the war has restored him to certain
human rights. He only sees so many
machines, the mission of which it is to
do his work, and asks you to let him
alone in their management. He begs
of you to give him this “poor privil-
ege,” and gravely tells you that they
cannot be made to work at all if this
be denied him.”

If this be the spirit of Georgia, Mr.
Johnson, we the friends of the Freedmen
must not, cannot allow Georgia to be
left to herself in her treatment of the
Freedmen. We must by some means
make Georgia willing to allow that the
colored race are to have equal rights with
the whites and the privilege of living
peacefully and honorably among them
even through it cost another war. Eo.

“In one town which I visited, an old
negro man was horsewhipped at noon-
day, on the public street, for asking a
white man for money due him for
services rendered. In another, a ne-
gro boy was threatened with shooting
if he did not quietly accept a dollar as
the price of a summer’s work in a
blacksmith’s shop. In another, a girl
was hung up by the thumbs for
twelve hours because she failed to ac-
complish a certain task in spinning.
In another, a woman was severely
whipped about the head for asserting,
that she was a free person. In still
another, a woman was almost murder-
ed by the cowhide—one white man
whipping her while two others held
her. At Columbus, a man said to me,
with a quiet chuckle, that a right
smart chance of niggers had been
found dead in his county lately, with
bullet-holes in their heads. At At-
lanta, another told me that they re-
cently had occasion to dredge a small
river near his town, and brought to
light the bodies of “about twenty big
buck niggers.” Do not these facts set
up a sign-board so large that he who
runs may read ?

Between Augusta and Milledgeville,
I rode in a stage in which were also
two delegates of the convention-—both
of them intelligent and well-informed
men of mature years. I had been ask-
ing some questions about the Georgia
school system, and had just remarked
that I hoped the time would soon
come when school-houses would be
as numerous in Georgia as in Massa-
chusetts. “Well, I hope it never
will come,” said one of them; “po-
pular education’s all a d––d hum-
bug, in my judgement.” “I think so,
too,” answered the other. “I used
to be in favor of it; but since I’ve
seen what it leads to in the North, I’m
opposed to it.” “That’s just it,” con-
cluded the first; “it’s well enough to
give boys who are to be professional
men a good education; but reading,
writing, and arithmetic are full as
much as ought to be taught the com-
mon people.”

From the average Georgia stand-
point, he is half insane who talks of
educating the negro. “What, build
school-houses for niggers?” exclaim-
ed a citizen to a Cincinnati gentleman,
with whom I sat in the public room
at the Macon hotel. “Well, when
we do, I’ll just let you know.”
Some of the leading men see and say
that the interests of the state will be
promoted by educating the freedmen;
but nine-tenths of the people sneer
just as the Macon man did. Yet,
within four blocks of that same hotel
I saw a negro porter in a store labor-
ing at his spelling-book in the corner,
when no customers were in; and a
young negro woman with her spelling-
book fastened to the fence, that she
might study while at work over the
wash-tub. Yet I’m everywhere told
that the nigger can’t learn, and money
spent in educating him would be mo-
ney thrown away.-—N. Y. Indepen-
dent.

Hobson's choice.

At Cambridge, England, one sees
an interesting street or alley called
Hobson's Alley. It was here that the
stables of that very Hobson who gave
us the proverbial expression of "Hob-
son's choice" stood. Hobson was the
keeper of a livery stable, and each
horse let out was placed furthest from
the door, the next hirer being requir-
ed to take the horse that was nearest
the door, that being the one longest
unworked. People could select the
horse, but it was managed so that it
should always be that nearest the door;
that was "Hobson's choice."

Bangkok Recorder.

The following timely notes have been
prepared by one who justly claims
to be pretty well read on the great sub-
ject of International law, and we
think we do well in giving them the
prominence we now do in this No. of
the Recorder. It seems to us high
time that the question of Naturali-
zation should be discussed here in its
relations to the subjects of the Siamese
government. If we have been cor-
rectly informed, many of the subjects
of the government who have been
proselyted to the Roman Catholic reli-
gion by French Missionaries are bold
to assert that they have consequently
removed their allegiance from the
Siamese government to the French,
and hence claim exemption from
paying the duties that are requir-
ed of them by the servants of the
government. A little reflection should
be sufficient to convince them that
this notion carried out in practice
must be preposterous. We trust there-
fore that their religious teachers have
too much good sense to propogate this
mischievous doctrine.

Consuls their duties, powers,
Naturalization

Wheaton observes (Chap. II. Sec.
IV. fol. 215) "the municipal laws and
institutions of any State may operate
beyond its own territory, and within
the territory of another State, by
special compact between two States.
Such are the treaties by which the
consuls, and other commercial agents
of one nation are authorized to exer-
cise over their own countrymen, a
jurisdiction within the territory of the
state where they reside. The nature
and extent of this peculiar jurisdiction
depends upon the stipulations of the
Treaty between the two States. A-
mong Christian nations it is generally
confined to the descision of controver-
sies in civil cases arising between
the merchants, seamen and other sub-
jects of the state; in foreign countries
to the registering of wills, contracts, and
other instruments, executed in the
presence of the consul; and to the ad-
ministration of the estates of their fel-
low subjects deceased within the terri-
torial limits of the consulate. The res-
ident consuls of the Christian powers
in Turkey, the Barbary States, and
other Mahomedan countries exercise
both civil and criminal jurisdiction
over their countrymen, to the exclusion
of the local magistrates and tribunals.
This jurisdiction is ordinarily subject,
in civil cases, to an appeal to the supe-
rior tribunals of their own country.
The criminal jurisdiction is usually
limited to the infliction of pecuniary
penalties; and in offences of a higher
grade, the functions of the consul are
similar to those of the police magis-
trate or "judge d' instruction." He
collects the documentary and other
proofs, and sends them, together with
the prisoner, home to his own country
for trial."

This view is supported by Phill-
emore (Vol. 2. Part 7. chap. 1. Sec.
CCXLV. fol. 239.) "The status of
the consulate therefore at the present
time seems to require a two-fold divi-
sion viz:—

1. The Legal status of Consuls, in
Christian countries.

2. The Legal status of Consuls in
the Levant and in Mahomedan coun-
tries.

The duties expected from such con-
suls and the mode of performing them
are fully explained by Phillmore in
chap. V. fol. 271. And Sec.
CCLXXVII. Fol. 274. contains an
extract from the treaty of peace be-
tween Great Britain and China in
1842-43, article 13th, granting pow-
ers of an extended character to
consuls, requiring in some respects
the exercise of judicial and executive
functions.

It appears to me that Siam comes
under the last category, which, whilst
it grants to consuls more extensive
powers than in Christian countries,
does not authorize them to act con-
trary to, or at variance with, the laws
of Siam.

Having thus briefly pointed out the
position and duties of Consuls in this
country, and the power under which
they act, it remains to be examined
whether they can grant letters of na-
turalization, and to whom. This ques-
tion is one which presents no great
difficulty. VATEL says that a nation or
the sovereign who represents it, may
grant to a foreigner the quality of
citizen, by admitting him into the bo-
dy of the political society. This is
called "naturalization". In Siam
the point, is who is entitled to the
protection of the flag of a particular
nation? The English Consul grants
such protection to those who can pro-
duce proofs of having resided a cer-
tain time in a British Colony, such as
Hongkong, Singapore, Malacca, Pen-
ang or British India in so far as Asia-
tics are concerned. But the French
have only Sri-gon, Pondicherry, an
Bourbon from which they can derive
similar rights. To recognize as entit-
led to the protection of the British or
French flags, citizens of Bangkok or
inhabitants of Siam, is not, as far as I
can trace in the books written on the
subject, legal, and is contrary to the
laws of nations. Moreover change of
religion does not justify exchange of
allegiance on the part of the subject.
He may leave the country and seek
another more tolerant and less restric-
tive, where he may at the end of a
series of years apply for letters of
"naturalization"; but he cannot in
his own country, and of his own free
will renounce his allegiance to his
rightful sovereign and place himself
under the protection of a foreign flag;
neither can a Consul or Ambassador
extend such protection to him (see
Wheaton fol: 172 and appendix fol.
910 and following. Phillimore Vol. I
Chapter XVII Section CCCXXIII,
fol: 348 and following.

Wildman Vol II. fol : 42; on na-
tional character mentions that in the
case of Factories in the Eastern parts
of the world, European persons trad-
ing under the shelter of those establish-
ments are conceived to take their nation-
al character from that association under
which they live and carry on the na-
tional commerce; but these factories,
such as were possessed by European
nations in the East in former years,
have mostly ceased to exist, and con-
sequently the laws which regulated
them have also lost their force, and
cannot at any rate be said to justify
indiscriminate naturalization.

From the foregoing it may there-
fore be gathered that consuls have
somewhat more extended powers in
this country in a judicial point of
view, but that such powers do not give
them authority to afford the protection
of their flag to people who are not
legally entitled to naturalization by a
residence lengthened or a possession
in the country which the Consul re-
presents.

Domestic Animals of Siam

Our friends abroad who have a de-
sire to become better acquainted than
they are with the manners and cus-
toms of Siam will, we are inclined to
think, be glad to have us give them
occasionally a chapter on the domes-
tic animals of the country. And as
the Recorder is largely devoted to
communicating all sorts and kinds of
information relative to the Siamese,
we propose now commencing a series
of articles on the subject above men-
tioned.

We begin with the subject of Dogs
as this animal is the most conspicuous
of all the Siamese domestic animals,
the monstrous Elephant, even, not ex-
cepted.

The Dogs of Siam are almost ex-
clusively of the breed vulgarly deno-
minated pariah. Their physiognomy
bears a striking resemblance to that
of the jackal family. Five tenths of
them, we judge, are of a light sorril
color—two tenths dun—two tenths
black, and another brindle, speckled or
spotted. They are generally rather
small. A large dog is exceedingly rare.
There are a few lap-dogs to be found
here and there among the more afflu-
ent classes who feel able to keep such
pets; but they are exotics.

Dogs may be counted by tens of
thousands in the great metropolis and
by millions in all the kingdom. A
large majority of the families of this
city have full as many canine mem-
bers of their households as human. The
reason of this extraordinary propor-
tion of dogs is not because the peo-
ple have any unusual attachment for
them, but rather because they know
not how to get rid of them, and not
commit a sin that would be likely to
ruin their characters as good Bud-
dhists. The sin of killing animals is ac-
counted by all Buddhists as one of the
most henious. And the reason it is
so considered results, probably, in
part from the dogma of the Buddhist
religion that each animal is possessed,
or in part occupied by some spirit of
mankind in a state of transmigration
from the spirit world. It may per-
chance be the spirit of a father, or,
mother, or brother, or sister, or wife,
or husband, or child, or one of the
long since departed of ones ancestors,
or of others who were noble or igno-
ble good or evil. Possibly the spirit
of a future Buddh may be inhabiting
the body of the dog, or cat, or fish, or
snake which one is tempted to kill.
O how sad, thinks a pious Buddhist
would it be in the progress of intermi-
nable ages to find that myself had
dishonored so august a being by driv-
ing life out of the body in which he
once lived! — There is also another
motive leading all Buddhists to dread
killing animals, which is the apparent
unmercifulness of the act. They hold
that all animals love life as much as
man does, and that it is as painful and
horrifying for them to die as it is for
man, and hence that to kill them
evinces great cruelty and a spirit the
farthest possible from a happy hereaf-
ter. Now if they can steer clear of
this sin, they seem to regard themselves
as being very holy. The most com-
mon mode of speaking in praise of
ones own moral character is to say
why. I have never designedly killed
any animal! And this is the lock
which always closes fast the door
against all conviction of need, of any
help out of themselves to save from sin.

Hence we may conclude that it is
mainly a desire to save themselves
from future misery which leads these
Buddhists to suffer their dogs to be-
come so inordinately numerous about
their houses. The hope of any parti-
cular benefit from them as guards of
their property must, we think, be
quite feebly developed.

The question naturally arises here,
—How is it that the people are not
absolutely overrun by dogs if they are
so opposed to killing them? Our an-
swer is that by far the largest part
of them die from sheer starvation
while but a few weeks old, another
large part die from the same cause
in the course of a year. Another large
part are so beaten and wounded by
even the pious Buddhists that they
die of their wounds; and finally an-
other large part are killed outright by
impious Buddhist and others in fits
of anger.

A very common mode of getting re-
lief when greatly annoyed by too
great an accumulation of dogs in any
homestead, is to catch them and carry
them off in a boat to some temple far
away, or to a desolate place where
they will not readily find their way back
again. It is not accounted a henious
sin to be thus unkind to them however
sure they may be to perish ultimately
from the change, provided one does
not directly take their lives from
them. But this mode of deliverance
from dogs is not often of long
continuance, for the creatures will
often times find their way back again,
even swimming the broad river, espe-
cially so, if their old home had been
in the main a tolerable one for them.
And should they not return, their pla-
ces are quickly filled by other dogs in
the neighborhood, who, being forced
by oppression and famine are quick
to discern where they may improve
their circumstances, and finding an
eligible vacancy run in and fill it. Or
what is quite as likely to happen, some
person in some distant part of the ci-
ty will bring his canine nuisances and
set them at liberty in your own yard
in the darkness of night. Hence this
plan of disposing of dogs amounts to
little more than a system of exchange.
Many dogs are ploied or let loose in
the courts of temples where they are
expected to eat the crumbs that fall
from the priest's table, or the fragments
of their last daily meal a little before
twelve o'clock. But they get nothing
to support their carnivorous natures,
and are compelled to change their
natures to granivorous for they must
live alone on rice and learn to love it.
But it is a miserable subsistence they
get in the priesthood. While they are
exempted from being beaten and
wounded as they would be daily at
all other places and are no longer lia-
ble to be subjected to the cruel sys-
tem of being cast away among utter
strangers, they are compelled to fight
with one another desperately for
their daily pittance. Consequently
you will see the strongest of them full
of the most loathsome sores which they
have got by the bites of other dogs,
and the weaker classes shrinking up
into mere skin and bone by absolute
starvation. And you will see these
mere skeletons attempting to bark but
not able to raise much more than a
whisper. It is so much the nature of
Siamese dogs to bark, that they will
always attempt it, even though their
legs will not bear the concession it
produces, and though some thing
tantamount to crutches has to be emi-
ployed to support them under it.

But the barking and growling and
howling of the dogs that are able to
raise their voices is often unutterably
doleful. Whole neighborhoods of
them will unite on a moonlight night
and have a grand concert of barking
together. And when they turn to
howling one is tempted to fancy that
last plague of Egypt has fallen on the
neighborhood or is about to come.

As intimated above, there are even
Buddhists who will in fits of anger
kill dogs with brickbats and clubs and
other missiles by which they die a
lingering and cruel death. And when
dead they will drag their carcasses into
the river or into some street or lane
for the crows and vultures to feed upon.
Hence the many canine carcasses you
daily see floating in the river.

The more pious Buddhists will try
to make a good conscience of feeding
their dogs a little, just enough to keep
them alive, thinking it a work that
will redound to their good in some
future state of their transmigration.
Others while they dare not kill them,
will leave them without food as they
do fish, when they take them, without
their vital element water. They fancy
that in so doing they cannot be charge-
able with killing them because they
die themselves. If we take a gun and
put an end to their misery at once
they shudder at our conduct and pro-
nounce us very irreligious: and when,
finding ourselves overrun with dogs, we
take what appears to them a little
milder course because bloodless, and
destroy them with strychnine, they
cannot help thinking that our future
happiness is, to say the least, greatly
imperiled by such treatment of ani-
mal life.

It should, in conclusion, be said that
there are a few tolerably good looking
dogs among the pariah breed in the
city, and it is thought that a little training
with good feeding makes them very
trust-worthy watch dogs. We need say
but a few words about the continual
nuisance of this immense herd of dogs
in the city from their natural propen-
sity to bite.—No person is safe in
walking about the city without a stout
cane which will not break by striking
it over the head of a dog, or an um-
brella which he can suddenly open and
interpose between him and his canine
enemy. The cane will rarely need to
come to blows if you keep it continu-
ally flirting behind your back to fright-
en your pursuers from your heels. A
better way is to have one of your men
following you closely with a boat pad-
dle in hand with which to beat them off.

It is very remarkable how few cases
of Hydrophobia are heard of occurring
in this city. We, who have been here
more than 30 years, and much of the
time in large medical practice, do not
recollect of having seen more than two
cases nor to have heard of more than
a dozen occurring in Bangkok during all
that time.

Attack of Pirates.

March 10th 1866, at daylight, fine
weather and moderate breezes, north-
erly, weighed and made sail, and
stood out of the harbour of Hong-
Kong bound for Bangkok, in company
with the Ham. bark "George Henry",
and a Norwegian brig. 2 P. M. abreast of
the Ladrone islands, when we observed
a Loreha rigged craft, which had come
out with us from Hong Kong, keeping
along under the land, and being join-
ed by another craft of the same rig,
they both hoisted stinkpots to there mast
heads, and stood right across our bows.
On seeing this I had the ship cleared
for action.

As soon as we had passed some dis-
tance ahead, they steered right for us,
keeping in our wake, so that our
broadside guns could not bear upon
them. We could distinctly see the men
on board of them, who had red tur-
bans on their heads and sashes on
their waists. They now commenced
firing grape and musketry, on which I
hauled the vessel on the starboard
tack, with her head towards the Lad-
rone islands, so as to bring our broad-
side guns to bear upon the pirates, but
the man at the wheel getting wounded,
the vessel got into the wind and lost
head way, and while we were backing
the fore-topsail, one of the pirate run
under our stern, and through a grap-
line on board, at the same time throw-
ing stinkpots on the poop. The other
pirate sailed round us firing and
throwing stinkpots on board.

The stinkpots forced us to retire
and leave the poop, when about 30 of
the pirates boarded and took posses-
sion, and a hand to hand fight com-
menced, we defended ourselves on the
main deck, being partially protected
by the boats on the davits. In the
mean time the ship gradually filled
and shot ahead, one of the men cut
the grappline, and the pirate dropped
astern, when we made a sally and
drove the pirates who were on our
deck overboard, leaving most of their
weapons behind them. The other pirate
coming close to our starboard side, re-
ceived a shot in the bows from a six
pounder, which shattered her consider-
ably, when they both kept off for the
Ladrone islands.

We had one man killed, eight
Chinese and four Siamese wounded,
more or less severely.

Neither myself nor my chief officer,
recognized any of the pirates; but
the Chinese on board said that one
man amongst the pirates had been
cook on board this vessel.

To the Editor of the Bangkok Recorder.

Sir:-— The Parisian correspondent
of the Penang Argus, an extract from
whose writings appeared in your last
issue, alluding to a "curious cabalistic
calculation" respecting the present
Emperor of the French, does not relate
it in its entirety, and as it may prove
of interest to some of your readers, I
will now give it to you.

The revolution which overthrew the Bour-
bons and led to the overthrow of Europe,
occurred in ..... 1789
Which figures added together, give ..... 25
which added to the above, give ..... 1814
the year of the first restoration.
The second restoration happened in ..... 1815
which figures added up as above, give ..... 15
brings us to the revolution of ..... 1830
and these being added as above, give ..... 19
and point to the year of the death of the .....
Duke of Orleans, which Louis Philippe in-
fluence never recovered ..... 1849

But here the chain appears to break:
Amateurs of "cabalistic calculations"
are not to be defeated by such a trifle,
so they have continued from another
epoque.

The Revolution which drove the
second branch of the Bourbons into
exile took place in 1848, and by a
similiar process of arithmetic as above
we reach 1869. "Napoleon III. was
declared Emperor in 1852," says the
correspondent of the Argus, "and
it is predicted he will fall in 1869."
Whether events will justify the calcu-
lation remains to be seen; I doubt the
Emperor's faith in his star being shook
by such a puerile array of figures,

LOCAL.

About twenty dwelling houses were
burned down in the village of Banana
on the evening of the 15th. That village
is about a mile north of the palace of
the Wangna on the northern or right
bank of the river. The fire is reported
to have began in the mansion of Phya
T’ep—that one of his slaves in car-
rying a lamp or torch into the bedroom
where his lord lay sick accidentally set
fire to the mosquito bars of his bed,
which almost instantly involved other
equally inflammable materials about
it; and quickly seized the wood work
of the house with such power as quite
to petrify the inmates with terror. We
have not learned that any human lives
were lost in the fire. Most of the build-
ing’s are said to have been made of
teak wood.

This is another warning to be added
to the multitudes that have happened
in this city within a few years past,
and the lesson is, that the greatest cau-
tion should be used in bringing lamps
or lighted cigars, or opium pipes into
close proximity to cotton mosquito
bars, which in the degree of their
inflammability are but little removed
from gun powder. This caution is
especially necessary in a dry and windy
time such as we have had in the after-
noon and evenings of the last fortnight.
A lamp set down but a few feet from the
bars is in danger of setting fire to them
by a gust of wind bringing the loose
ends of them over the lamp. It should
be accounted a crime to lie down to read,
or write, or sew under a cotton mus-
quito bar of only the ordinary size,
even if the bars be well tucked up,
for the person doing so is in danger of
dropping to sleep with his lamp burn-
ing, and then what wonder if he soon
find his bed on fire and his house in
flames, and a large community invol-
ved in the same catastrophe?

Murder.

On Sunday the 8th inst. a Siamese
boy about 11 years old was found dead
in the vicinity of Wat Râk'ang. It ap-
pears that some monstrous villain had
murdered him in cold blood from the
despicable motive of stealing from his
person a pair of silver anklets worth a-
bout eight Ticals and a small gold lock-
et said to be worth four Ticals. On
examination it was found that his neck
had been broken by wringing it and
four of his ribs stove in probably by
stamping on his side. The child is
reported to be the son of a Siamese
medical doctor named Nai Sook who
with his mother live in the village
called Ban Lao not far from Temple
Råk'ang. The lad is said to have gone
out to fly his kite, and was murdered
in his absence. We are not informed
whether the murderer has been found
or not, but hear that the king is deter-
mined to adopt some stringent meas-
ures for forbidding parents to allow
their children to go about unprotected
wearing silver, gold, or jewels in any
of the usual forms.

It is time that these native parents
were thus checked in such displays of
their pride and vanity on the persons
of their children on all occasions. While
we have occasion now and then to re-
port cases of murder in the city of
Bangkok, it must be allowed that this
crime is of rare occurrence here as com-
pared with other populous cities in this
Eastern world, and we are happy in a-
warding to the Siamese people and na-
tion this meed of praise. A large ma-
jority of the cases of murder that do
occur in Siam it is believed are com-
mitted by Chinese, Malays and others.
The Siamese are very far from being
a blood thirsty and murderous people.
This is attributable, it may be, to the re-
markable prominence their religion
gives the 6th Commandment.

Our Buddhist Champion
again.

We have just recieved another ar-
ticle from our Buddhist Antagonist.
It is written in Siamese and we have
got time to prepare it for the present is-
sue. We shall endeavour to give it the
thorough attention which we conceive
it demands. The author's proceeding
effort was in our opinion so feeble that
we thought (perhaps imprudently) that
he had "run out at the little end of
the horn" and that that would proba-
bly be the last that we should hear from
him. Consequently we thought it not
sufficiently dignified to reply to that
effort by any formal argument. This
hasty thought in us appears to have a-
roused our Goliath to unusual acuteness
and vigor, and we shall need to take a
little extra time to study a suitable an-
swer for him. It would be very sad
to have the Bible and Christianity now
overthrown by a Buddhist Champion
after so many thousand years of progress
from conquering to conquer.

Our friend Mr. J. Thomson the
Photographer, we think, has returned
to the city; but from whence he
comes, or how, we know not, as we
have not heard a word about it, and
saw only the shadow of his head in
Captain Ames' boat yesterday.

Monstrous Oppression.

In one of the late issues of our Si-
amese Recorder we had occasion to
point out very oppressive conduct on
the part of a petty of band government
officers in seizing and beating and
kicking and torturing people in Bang-
kok Noi without judge or jury or any
kind of trial whom they charged of
smoking opium illegally. It seems
that a royal edict had sometime before
been issued to seize all drunkards and
opium smokers and press them into
the work of building the Pramane for
the cremation of the royal remains of
the late second king. And hence the
royal constables and sheriffs were sent
out to make diligent search for such
characters, and that, when found by
legal search and proved guilty, to
compel them to go and serve the king in
that particular business. The report
we gave of it, and which has since been
fully corroborated, was, substantially,
that among the few guilty ones there
were many entirely innocent who were
seized by the royal constables, so that
a great panic had taken the whole
settlement and many families had a-
bandoned their houses and fled into
the county. If the man of the
house could not be found the wife
was taken. If the persons had able
and influential lords or other friends
in whom they could hope for redress
they would follow their captors, and
not think of offering a bribe for free-
dom. But if they had no such aid to
fall upon, they would get clear by
presenting a bribe ranging from 20 to
180 Ticals, out of which, it was affirm-
ed, the constables would take care to
replenish well their own purses. If
their victims had no money to offer as a
bribe, or being innocent and noble
spirited were determined they would
not plead guilty, they were thrust them
into the stocks and closely pinched and
thus tortured to force them to confess,
and that oftentimes they were scolded
and kicked like the vilest dogs while in
the stocks because of their apparent
obstinacy in pleading not guilty.

Many persons of influence and char-
acter have since expressed their grati-
tude to us for exposing that pit of in-
iquity which none dared to broach
to the king. And we are glad to learn
that that revelation has brought down
upon those abominable officers the just
indignation of the supreme power, and
will in all probability result ultimately
in great good. Thus do we feel en-
couraged to go on with our papers even
with a constant pecuniary loss.

NECESSITY OF A SURNAME.

But there happened to be one man
among the constables pointed out by
the name Nin, and as there are many
of the same name without a surname
to distinguish one from the other, a
man by the name of Nin living, per-
haps in the same neighborhood or em-
ployed in the same government services,
fearing that he might become unjustly
confounded with the other Nin has
sent us an article for our Siamese pa-
per, the object of which is to prove
that he cannot be the man concerned
in that monstrous oppression. We
hope and trust he may be innocent.

The peculiar trials of that Nin
whoever he be, has started a new
thought in our minds. It is that the
time seems now to have fully come, for
all the families of Siam to have a fixed
and legalized surname. Hitherto
there has been no such thing. Each
man and woman and child has only
a personal monosyllabic baby name,
much as it used to be in the infancy
of the all the European nations. But
now the Siamese have come into such
intimacy with the western nations, are
going so deeply into business with the
people of those nations—-and business,
too that must needs be often greatly em-
barrassed without some better plan than
at present of designating individuals,
are we not quite right in judging that
no delay should be made on giving
every man and woman in Siam a sur-
name? England felt obliged to do so
as did all the nations of Europe when
they passed from a state of childhood
into full manhood. Has not Siam at-
tained to her majority? Why should all
her people longer live with only their
baby names? Let that Mr. Nin be
called Nin Lee or Nin Bee or Nin
What-not and he will no longer be in
danger of becoming confounded with
forty dozen otherMr. Nins.

Queer Statistics.

We find the following curious data
going the rounds. They are interest-
ing, however reliable or not they may
be.

There are on the globe about 1,288,-
000,000 of souls, of which
race.
race.
race.
race.

There are 3,648 languages spoken,
and 1,000 different religions.

The yearly mortality of the globe is
3,333,333 persons. This is at the rate
of 91,584 per day, 3,730 per hour, 60
minute. So each pulsation of our
heart marks the decease of some hu-
man creature.

The average of human life is 36
years.
One fourth of the population die at
or before the age of 7 years-—one half
at or before 17 years.

Among 10,000 persons one arrives
at the age of 100 years, one in 500
attains the age of 90, and one in 100
lives to the age of 80.

Married men live longer than single
ones. In 1,000 persons 65 marry,
and more marriages occur in June and
December that in any other month of
the year.

One-eighth of the whole population
is military.

Professions exercise a great influ-
ence on longevity.

In 1,000 individuals who arrive at
the age of 70 years, 48 are priests,
orators, or public speakers; 40 are
agriculturists, 33 are workmen, 32
soldiers or military employees, 20 ad-
vocates or engineers, 27 professors,
and 24 doctors. Those who devote
their lives to the prolongation of that
of others die soonest.

There are 335,000,000 Christians.

There are 5,000,000 Israelites.

There are 60,000,000 of the Asiatic
Religion.

There are 160,000,000 Mahome-
dans

There are 200,000,000 Pagans.

In the Christian Churches:

170,000,000 profess the Roman
Catholic.

759,000,000 profess the Greek faith.

80,000,000 profess the Protestant.

Making free with the
Commandments.

The late Dr. Lockhart, of the Col-
lege Church, Glasgow, when traveling
in England, was sojourning at an inn,
when the Sabbath came round.

On entering the public room, and
about to set out for church, he found
two gentlemen preparing for a game
of chess. He addressed them in words
to this effect:—-

"Gentlemen, have you locked up
your portmanteaus carefully ?"

"No! What! are there thieves in
this house ?"

"I do not say that," replied the
doctor, "only I was thinking that if
the waiter comes in and finds you
making free with the fourth command-
ment, he may think of making free
with the eighth."

Upon this, the gentlemen said there
was something in that, and so laid
aside their game.—-British Workman.

Slavery as a punishment for
Crime.

[The Anti-Slavery Prohibitory
Amendment declares that "neither
slavery nor involuntary servitude shall
exist, except as a punishment for
crime". The ex-slaveholders have
fastened their keen eyes on the phrase
which we print in italics, and some of
them think that it will be quite easy
to re-establish slavery at the South
under the exception therein expressed.
Witness the following extract from the
Southern correspondence of the Boston
Daily Advertiser:]

In the South Carolina Convention,
one of the leading up-country deleg-
ates, during the debate on the slavery
prohibition clause of the Constitution,
said, substantially, that the condition,
as well as the name, of slavery should
be prohibited; and in this view he took
exception to the phrase "neither
slavery nor involuntary servitude shall
exist except as a punishment for
crime," etc.; for, he argued, it will be
very easily possible for the legislature,
if so disposed, to re-establish the con-
dition of slavery by a system of crimes
and punishments impliedly authorized
by that clause. I noticed the argument
at the time, because it was identical
with one made last winter in the Sen-
ate by Mr. Sumner. Down here in
Southwestern Georgia is the man who
furnishes the practical illustration for
the argument. He is called Gen. John
T. Morgan, and he has been making
a speech on the negro question, which
the editor of his county paper indorses
as "sensible." "The grand point in his
speech," says the editor, "was that in
order to wield the bone and muscle of
the negro effectively in the various in-
dustrial pursuits of the South, we must
put him in competition with white
laborers; and we thought he was very
successful in its demonstration." The
abstract of his views on this point is
very brief; but it is full enough on the
main question as the following para-
graph shows:

"He urged that, as the Constitution
gives the power to inflict involuntary
servitude as a punishment for crime, a
law should be so framed as so to enable
the judicial authorities of the state to
sell into bondage again those negroes
who should be found guilty of certain
crimes; and, in conclusion, said he
thought that this, in connection with
the whipping post and the pillory,
would do more to check vagrancy,
theft, robbery, and other crimes among
the negroes than all the penitentiaries
which could be built.

POSITION OF THE COLORED RACE IN
EUROPE.—Europeans do not under-
stand that antipathy which American
affection pretends to feel against the
colored race. Alexander Dumas, the
quadroon, was the guest of princes in
Europe; his father, the mulatto, was a
renowned general in Napoleon's time;
his son, an octoroon, has just married
the widow Princess Narishkin. Count
Pushkin, the great Russian poet, too,
was a quadroon; so was Baron
Feuchtersleben, under-secretary of pub-
lic instruction in Austria; and, if we
go back to older times, the first Duke
of Tuscany, Alexandro Medici, who
reigned from 1530 to 1537, was a
mulatto, and the Emperor Charles V.
had so little antipathy to negro descent
that he gave his daughter Margaret in
marriage to the mulatto duke. His
portrait, with woolly hair and thick
lips, is still seen in the public gallery
of Florence, among the Dukes of Tus-
cany; and it gives one always a pe-
culiar pleasure to show his dark face
to the Americans, who speak with ter-
ror about miscegenation. Had Messrs.
Mackay and Sala studied the question
in Europe before they went in the
United States, they would not have
made themselves so ridiculous in their
correspondence.—Cor. Tribune.

THE NEW EARTH.—But I do love
mountains, and I do hope that, if ever
we inherit "everlasting life," it may
be on this earth—this beautiful first
home of ours, with all its wealth of
precious memories, with all its pleas-
ant friends and sweet associations,
with all its sin and curse removed,
and with its "wilderness like Eden,
and its desert like the garden of the
Lord." I wonder if the often-noticed
light gladness of my nature, and the
ever-felt undertone of sadness, do not
both grow out of the same character-
istic—my intense appreciation of life.
I mean of living and of having my
friends and all God's creatures living
about me! Earth, air, and water, with
all their countless forms, are so beau-
tiful; friendship and love are so sweet;
knowledge is so interesting; and truth
so sublime; existence, in its sum total,
is such blessedness, and the "passing
away" of it is such an infinite loss,
that I am always happy in the present;
and sad in the past, in which I see so
much of it already gone; and sad in
the future, at so little distance down
which I see "come the full stop."
Oh! if we have not at least a chance
of immortality, it would seem almost
wicked in our good Father to mock
us with life at all. Do not these con-
tradictory terms prove, with at least
the force of a strong probability—
strong enough to found a strong con-
fidence upon—that we must live on!
And then those glowing promises,
that could not come to us only from
him and through men full of inspira-
tion: "To them who, by patient con-
tinuance in well-doing, seek for glory,
honor, and immortality, [he will give]
eternal life."—Prof. C. F. Mansfield,
May, 1865.

THE "SANCY" DIAMOND.—The his-
tory of this diamond (weight fifty-four
carats) is curious. Nicolas Harlai,
Signeur of Sancy, its possessor, wish-
ing to raise money upon it for the be-
nefit of his friend, Henry IV., intrusted
it to the care of a faithful servant. The
man was beset by robbers and murder-
ed. His master recovered the body,
and calculating on his late vassal's fi-
delity, opened the stomach, where, as
he expected, he found his lost treasure.
He then carried out his intention,
pledged it to the Jews, and was never
afterward able to redeem it. In 1649
it belonged to Henrietta Maria, Dow-
ager Queen of England, from whom it
passed to the Duke of York. After his
abdication, the unlucky James sold it
to Louis XIV. for £25,000. During
the memorable days of September,
1792, it was stolen with the rest of the
regalia: it reappeared in 1838, when
the Princess Paul Demidoff bought it
from an agent of the Bourbons for
£76,000. Last winter it was on view
at Messrs. Garrard's, in London; and
finally it has returned to its native
land, being purchased for £90,000 by
Sir Jamsetjee Jeejeebhoy, of Bombay.
ONE OF THE ANOMALIES OF LITER-
ARY HISTORY is, that is has often been
the lot of those men who have con-
tributed largely to the mirth or recrea-
tion of others to endure more than an
ordinary share of misery and want
in their own lives. The most enter-
taining portions of literature have been
written by men whose hearts have been
bowed down by sorrow, and at mo-
ments when that sorrow has been
heaviest. It was in the gloom of a
mother's death, deepened by his own
poverty, that Johnson penned the
charming tale of "Rasselas;" it was
in the chill desolation of a bare and
fireless garret that poor Goldsmith,
the beloved vagabond of literature,
sketched the brightest pictures of
domestic happiness the world ever had;
it was from a sick-bed, in sore distress,
and in a necessitous exile, that Tom
Hood shook all England with laughter.
The enchantment of Scott, the satire
of Jerrold, half the gems of
English wit and humor, have been
thrown out by genius in its most
sorrowful moments.—-Dublin Univer-
sity Magazine.

Important if True

A correspondent of the Scientific
American says: "If you have a boat
that leaks badly, and it is a strong cur-
rent, or if you are towing it up stream,
all you have to do to keep it dry is
this: Bore a hole through the bottom
and insert a piece of tin or iron half
round through the hole, letting it ex-
tend a few inches below the bottom
of the boat, and all the water will run
out without any labor. I think a ship
at sea could be kept afloat, if you
could keep her going four miles per
hour."

The Philosopher Answered.

A Frenchman who had won a high
rank among men of science, yet who
denied the God who is the author of
science, was crossing the Great Sahara
in company with an Arab guide. He
noticed, with a sneer, that at certain
times his guide, whatever obstacles
might arise, put them all aside, and
kneeling on the burning sands, called
on his God. Day after day passed,
and still the Arab never failed; till at
last one evening the philosopher, when
he rose from his knees, asked with a
contemptuous smile, "How do you
know there is a God?" The guide fix-
ed his burning eye on the scoffer for
a moment in wonder, and then said
solemnly, "How do I know there is
a God? How did I know that a man,
and not a camel, passed my hut last
night in the darkness? was it not by
the print of his foot on the sand? Even
so—-and he pointed at the sun, whose
last rays were flashing over the lonely
desert—-"that footprint is not that of
a man."

Where Wealth Begins.

Wealth begins in a tight roof that
kieps the rain and wind out; in a
good pump that yields you plenty of
sweet water; in two suits of clothes so
as to change your dress when you are
wet; in dry sticks to burn; in a good
double-wicked lamp, and three meals;
in a horse or a locomotive, to cross the
land; in a boat to cross the sea; in
tools to work with; in books to read;
and so in giving, on all sides by tools
and auxiliaries, the greatest possible
extension to our powers, as if it added
feet, and hands, and eyes, and blood,
length to the day, and knowledge and
good will.—Emerson.

Be Good Humored.

The Chicago Journal commences a
"plea for good humor" as follows:

Our readers have remarked that we
sprinkle our columns with things sub-
stantial. We do this on purpose, and
with a purpose. We believe in "run-
ning" the cheerful, as well as the
cloudy side of human affairs. Life is
sober, the times are stern, people are
grave or mad. There is little jollity
in America. It's the all work and no
play makes Jack a dull boy, which
predominates in the American dispo-
sition. Leisure is rare, sport is rarer
and laughter is rarer than all. Grav-
ity becloudes the countinances of men
street. Men look sober and women
sad. Business! Business! There is
no end to business.—The social circle
is broken up, home is a remembered
dream.—Men and women meet occa-
sionally, and but to bow and say good
bye

Odds and Ends.

A golden rule for a young lady, is
to converse always with your female
friends, as if a gentleman were of the
party ; and with young men, as if
your female companions were present.

The greatest objection to those who
mean well is, that they seldom find
time to carry out their intentions.

A good deal of the consolation of-
fered in the world is about as solacing
as the assurance of the man to his
wife when she fell into the river.
" You'll find ground at the bottom,
my dear."

A Southern paper thinks that
"something is on foot in South Caro-
lina." She herself is on foot. She
used to ride "the high horse," but
can't now.

A specimen of scientific quartette
singing the verse given out runs
thus :—-

A Cleveland speculator fell asleep
in church, from which he was waked
by the pastor's reading. Surely
there is a vein for the silver and a
place for the gold where they find it."
Jumping to his feet he shook his book
at the minister, crying, "I'll take five
hundred shares."

The fretful Christian wrongs his
master sadly, for he seems to tell
every-body (what he knows is not
true) that Christ's yoke is hard and
his burden heavy.

Some fellows who tried to rob a
hen-roost in Winstead, Conn., found
when they went to go out, that the
door had blown too, and fastened them
in. The cries of the hens alarmed
the proprietor, who released the fel-
lows on their paying £25, and they
requested the newspapers should say
nothing about it.

Life is but a field of blackberry and
raspberry bushes. Mean people squat
down and pick the fruits no matter
how black their fingers; while genius,
proud and perpendicular, strides fier-
cely on, and gets nothing but scratches
and holes torn in his trousers.

What is the worst seat a man can
sit on? self con-ceit.

The attempt to read many books
often ends in thoroughly reading
none.

He who enters upon a career of
crime must come to a halt, or a halter.

A man hanging is better than a
vagabond; he has visible means of
support.

You needn't have such a reverence
for truth as always to stand at an
awful distance from it.

He that can keep his temper is bet-
ter than he that can keep a carriage.

A man that can be flattered is not
necessarily a fool, but you can always
make one of him.

A fellow who got drunk on election
day, said it was owing to his efforts
to put down "party spirits."

It is the opinion of the doctor that
the lawyer gets his living by plunder,
while the lawyer thinks the doctor
gets his by "pillage."

There is a whole sermon in the
saying of the old Persian : "In all
thy quarrels leave open the door of
reconciliation." We should never
forget it.

Dr Johnson says : "The habit of
looking on the best side of every event
is worth more than a thousand pounds
a year."

Impure words always leave there
stain. No story, however funny, should
ever be told, if it will leave in the
memory unclean associations.

The true secret of happiness is al-
ways to have a little less time than
one wants, and a little more money
than one needs.

Many persons have their best so-
ciety in their own hearts and souls
—-the purest memories of earth and
the sweetest hopes of heaven; their
loneliness cannot be called solitude.

It is difficult to unite tranquility
in accepting, and energy in using
the facts of life : but it is not impos-
sible; if it be, it is impossible to be
happy.

Lord vs. Laborer.

The following story of an English
peer is going the rounds. Lord S. is
an amateur boxer, who prides himself
upon his strength and dexterity in
pugilism:

Dining one day with the great bank-
er R——-, Lord S. hearing some
stories of the prowess of a farm laborer
on the estate, at once made a note of
the man's name and address. Next
morning his lordship mounted his horse
and rode off in search of the celebrated
athlete. He found him digging in his
garden.

"My good fellow," said the peer,
dismounting, pulling off his gloves,
"I've heard a great deal of your
strength and skill; let us have a fight."

The laborer looked at his visitor
for a moment without speaking; and
then, suddenly grappling with him,
flung him over the hedge,

"I say my good man" cried Lord
S. as soon as he recovered his senses
"will you do me a favor!" "What
haven't you had enough yet?" ex-
claimed the laborer, sulkily. "Oh yes
as far as I am personally concerned,
but please throw my horse over too."